When I first suspected that the man I lived with was lying to me, began with my instinct that something wasn't right. I cannot stress this enough. Your instincts, that gut feeling you have that something isn't sitting well with you is generally right. Go with that instinct and begin your search. Mine began with something as simple as his wallet. Men have wallets with lots of little pockets or sleeves that sometimes hide things away, like little pieces of paper. What I find amusing is that most men will leave their wallet sitting out for anyone to look at. It's almost as if they are saying, "I have nothing to hide." And it will make you think that way, trust me, I did. Who would be dumb enough to leave any clues of seeing other women sitting in an item anyone can look into?
Well, this man did. I found a list of women's birthdays. These women, as I can inform you about, aren't any family member or any old girlfriends. These are women he has been communicating with, dating, sending emails to over the past few years. I will explain how I found all that out later. Today we begin with the simple stuff. This piece of paper was very small and tucked deep in a pocket that if you opened and looked you would not have seen it. So when searching, dig deep.
The other items I found in his wallet are these VIP cards for bars. One is for a bar that he and I have never attended, nor does he say he likes going to. When I asked why he had this card, he said, "Oh, I went there once with a couple of buddies from work, I don't plan on going again, it was a young kid bar, and I'm a cranky old man." My response in my head is, then why save that card, throw it away? Little side note here, if they
talk a place down, say it's bad, or they will never go again, that's a
lie. They will go often and probably already have been there several
times.
The last item I found in his wallet is a punch card for a sex shop/lingerie store. This item typically would not upset me if it weren't for the fact that I haven't been the recipient for any of these items. So there is no purpose for this card that has been punched showing he spent well over $40.
So needless to say, simply exploring his wallet will give you some clue as to what he's been hiding. When I would search his wallet I would usually wait til he was getting into the shower so that I had ample time to explore each part of the wallet. If you are not comfortable doing this, the next few blog entries to come will help you explore other areas of your person's life without fear of getting caught. I am not afraid of getting caught because I am at a point with this man to not give a damn what he thinks. I know the truth and I am making changes in my life to move on without him. I will explain this more later. In the meantime, I hope this first step helps you begin your quest for truth. Feel free to contact me if you have any further questions. Remember, your instincts are right!
